Alexander the Great

[Almighty Colin]

No one mentioned the film after a week of showing? Guess that says something.

[Candice]

the movie got a very bad review...maybe that's the reason no one has mentioned it.

[JR]

I watched it last night. My opinion was that it sucked. He was one of the greatest military strategists in the history of the world, who never lost a battle... but the movie was not even about that at all. I wanted to see how he did it. I expected to see how this young guy rallied the army of a kingdom behind him and led them to victory time and time again and conquered most of the civilized world... I expected to see how he outwitted every army that got in his way with his tactics and bold strategies. I expected to see epic battles fought by an army that never lost a battle even when they were outnumbered 2 to 1 or more.

....Instead, I got to watch 2 1/2 hours of a bunch of skirt wearing queers with swords who could not stop making out with each other for more than 5 minutes at a time. When they did finally stop kissing each other, they just talked about how they could not wait to start making out and fuck each other again.

That movie is a bad joke. Oliver Stone should stick to anti-american propaganda, thats where he always shines and does his best work.


Sample movie dialog before one of the greatest battles in the history of civilization:

Alexander to generals: We can do it.
Generals: No we can't.
Alexander: Yes we can.
Generals: Are you sure.
Alexander: Uhm. Yeah. Pretty sure... but right now I have a boner, I will be right back.

Alexander walks outside...

Alexander to first soldier he sees: Thou sure hast a purty mouth. (while slowly and sensually raking his index finger across the soldiers cheek)

Soldier: Sir, you make my knees tremble with your slightest touch. Your eyes peirce my soul with their beauty, your skin is as white and perfect as mothers breast milk and i noticed you have quite the package under that dress.

Alexander: Perhaps you might enjoy my tongue in your ass before we fight tomorrow?

Camera then zooms in on soldiers face to show only a look of complete ecxtasy as Alexander drops to his knees.

[JR]

Just to clarify, I am not a homophobe. I could care less where anyone parks their cock as long as its not in me. I expected to see a movie about one of the greatest warriors who ever lived and ended up watching a 2 1/2 hr gay porno where people got stabbed from time to time.

[Lee]

Originally posted by JR@Dec 3 2004, 05:20 AM
I expected to see a movie about one of the greatest warriors who ever lived and ended up watching a 2 1/2 hr gay porno where people got stabbed from time to time.

Sounds like a night out in a rednack gay bar LOL

[Lee]

I would like to know though..

Do we get to see Farrels cock in the movie?

[JR]

Originally posted by Lee@Dec 3 2004, 05:30 AM
I would like to know though..

Do we get to see Farrels cock in the movie?

i am not sure if i should say something really funny or mean. give me a few minutes to sort out my thoughts.

[Jesse_DD]

I was disappointed with the movie. They missed the 5 year period of time that JR mention from the time he became king until he defeater persia. There were some really interesting battles during that time including one where he had to built a bridge to defeat an city/island (doesn't sound that great but in reality it was brilliant how he did it).

They did include a lot but I thought they left out some really important parts.

I think that a different director would have been good and I also think that the script could have been much better.

I am glad they covered the homosexual aspect of the film as it is no mystery that Alexander's lifelong friend was his lover and as soon as he died Alexander went downhill quickly...

I could write a 5 pager on the movie but I give it a 2.5/5 for trying. I would see it but don't have high expectations.

[Winetalk.com]

Lee,
your quest for a "gay movie" on your board was answered
;-)))

[Lee]

Originally posted by Serge_Oprano@Dec 3 2004, 05:44 AM
Lee,
your quest for a "gay movie" on your board was answered
;-)))

Haha yep it was

We had this discussion about Alexander a week ago as well as all the other movies where Farrel whips his cock out on camera

[Almighty Colin]

Originally posted by JR@Dec 3 2004, 08:15 AM
He was one of the greatest military strategists in the history of the world, who never lost a battle... but the movie was not even about that at all. I wanted to see how he did it. I expected to see how this young guy rallied the army of a kingdom behind him and led them to victory time and time again and conquered most of the civilized world... I expected to see how he outwitted every army that got in his way with his tactics and bold strategies.

Man, that is EXACTLY what I was hoping to see.

[Almighty Colin]

Historian and Greek classicist Victor Hanson's review:

"Well, I thought it was simply terrible. The film goes on for nearly three hours, but we hear nothing of what either supporters or detractors of Alexander, both ancient and modern, have agreed were the central issues of his life. Did he really believe in a unity of mankind, and were his mass mixed marriages, Persian dress, and kowtowing cynical, sincere, or delusions of megalomania? We see nothing of the siege of Tyre, Gaza, much less Thebes or even the burning of Persepolis. Other than the talking head Ptolemy, none of his generals have much of a character. There is nothing really in detail about the page purging other than a single reference; Stone, I would have thought, could have had a field day with Alexander’s introduction of both crucifixion and decimation.

The Gedrosian desert gets a few seconds. And what was the elephant scene in the jungle? Was that supposed to be dirty fighting in India, or the battle at the Hydaspes—which in fact was a brilliant Macedonian victory? The elephants were visually good, but without context or significance. So since Stone omitted the controversial and key issues of Alexander’s career, what do we get instead for at least over two thirds of the movie? Mostly sit-com drama, with gay and bi- subplots, in various bedrooms and banquet halls. Olympias was something out of a teen-aged vampire movie, not the sophisticated and conniving royal we read about in the sources. It is the old Dallas or Falcon Crest glossy pulp in Macedonian drag. Stone’s Alexander is a pouty, wimpy bore; the real figure, whatever your thoughts on him, was a killer and a fearful man of action. Gladiator’s Maximus was a far more engaging and forceful character—and that was a far better film as well.

There is also irony here. If we remember the embarrassing Troy, we are beginning to see, that all for all the protestations of artistic excellence and craftsmanship, Hollywood has become mostly a place of mediocrity, talentless actors and writers who spout off about politics in lieu of having any real accomplishment in their own field. I’ve heard so many inane things mouthed by Stone that I would like someone at last to address this question—why would supposedly smart insiders turn over $160 million to someone of such meager talent to make such an embarrassing film? Alexander the Great is third-rate Cecil B. Demille in drag."

[Lee]

I forget which channel it was [Discovery or History channel] but a few weeks ago Gary and i were engrossed in a program they showed about Greek history and specifically the great accomplishments of Alexander.

The one battle where he had to get onto an island specifically stood out.. that guy knew what he wanted and would stop at nothing to get it.. even if it meant having to build a 2 mile long walkway out of boulders... definately one of historys great warriors.

[Nickatilynx]

Originally posted by JR@Dec 3 2004, 05:15 AM
I watched it last night. My opinion was that it sucked. He was one of the greatest military strategists in the history of the world, who never lost a battle... but the movie was not even about that at all. I wanted to see how he did it. I expected to see how this young guy rallied the army of a kingdom behind him and led them to victory time and time again and conquered most of the civilized world... I expected to see how he outwitted every army that got in his way with his tactics and bold strategies. I expected to see epic battles fought by an army that never lost a battle even when they were outnumbered 2 to 1 or more.

....Instead, I got to watch 2 1/2 hours of a bunch of skirt wearing queers with swords who could not stop making out with each other for more than 5 minutes at a time. When they did finally stop kissing each other, they just talked about how they could not wait to start making out and fuck each other again.

That movie is a bad joke. Oliver Stone should stick to anti-american propaganda, thats where he always shines and does his best work.


Sample movie dialog before one of the greatest battles in the history of civilization:

Alexander to generals: We can do it.
Generals: No we can't.
Alexander: Yes we can.
Generals: Are you sure.
Alexander: Uhm. Yeah. Pretty sure... but right now I have a boner, I will be right back.

Alexander walks outside...

Alexander to first soldier he sees: Thou sure hast a purty mouth. (while slowly and sensually raking his index finger across the soldiers cheek)

Soldier: Sir, you make my knees tremble with your slightest touch. Your eyes peirce my soul with their beauty, your skin is as white and perfect as mothers breast milk and i noticed you have quite the package under that dress.

Alexander: Perhaps you might enjoy my tongue in your ass before we fight tomorrow?

Camera then zooms in on soldiers face to show only a look of complete ecxtasy as Alexander drops to his knees.

ahahahahahaha

Fuck!!!


ahahahahahaha

"""
Alexander to generals: We can do it.
Generals: No we can't.
Alexander: Yes we can.
Generals: Are you sure.
Alexander: Uhm. Yeah. Pretty sure... but right now I have a boner, I will be right back.

Alexander walks outside...""""

at this stage I was like ,"Typical crap dialogue , no wonder it bombed"

ahahahahahahahaha

[Nickatilynx]

Greek lawyers halt Alexander case

Director Oliver Stone says Alexander is historically accurate
Greek lawyers have indicated they have no plans to take legal action against the makers of film epic Alexander, after viewing an advanced screening.
Lawyers were upset by suggestions in the film, which opens across Greece on Friday, that Alexander was bisexual.

They argue there is no historical evidence supporting claims that the Macedonian leader had male lovers.

"Fortunately it was not what we had feared. The people can go and see the movie," said lawyer Giannis Varnakas.

"There is a kiss that can be interpreted in many ways, but we have avoided the worst," added Mr Varnakas.

The group of 25 lawyers had claimed the film was "not a true depiction of Alexander's life", and wanted this made clear to cinema-goers.


Irish actor Colin Farrell plays the Macedonian leader

They had requested a disclaimer at the start of the film warning audiences that it was not historically accurate.

However director Oliver Stone said there was a historian on set to ensure accuracy.

The lawyers' leader, Mr Varnakos, denied homophobia was the motive behind their action.

"We would have reacted the same was if the issue didn't involve homosexuality," he said.

"We just don't want a distortion of historical facts."

The film opened in the US last week to a slew of negative reviews.

[chodadog]

Originally posted by JR@Dec 3 2004, 05:15 AM
I watched it last night. My opinion was that it sucked. He was one of the greatest military strategists in the history of the world, who never lost a battle... but the movie was not even about that at all. I wanted to see how he did it. I expected to see how this young guy rallied the army of a kingdom behind him and led them to victory time and time again and conquered most of the civilized world... I expected to see how he outwitted every army that got in his way with his tactics and bold strategies. I expected to see epic battles fought by an army that never lost a battle even when they were outnumbered 2 to 1 or more.

....Instead, I got to watch 2 1/2 hours of a bunch of skirt wearing queers with swords who could not stop making out with each other for more than 5 minutes at a time. When they did finally stop kissing each other, they just talked about how they could not wait to start making out and fuck each other again.

That movie is a bad joke. Oliver Stone should stick to anti-american propaganda, thats where he always shines and does his best work.


Sample movie dialog before one of the greatest battles in the history of civilization:

Alexander to generals: We can do it.
Generals: No we can't.
Alexander: Yes we can.
Generals: Are you sure.
Alexander: Uhm. Yeah. Pretty sure... but right now I have a boner, I will be right back.

Alexander walks outside...

Alexander to first soldier he sees: Thou sure hast a purty mouth. (while slowly and sensually raking his index finger across the soldiers cheek)

Soldier: Sir, you make my knees tremble with your slightest touch. Your eyes peirce my soul with their beauty, your skin is as white and perfect as mothers breast milk and i noticed you have quite the package under that dress.

Alexander: Perhaps you might enjoy my tongue in your ass before we fight tomorrow?

Camera then zooms in on soldiers face to show only a look of complete ecxtasy as Alexander drops to his knees.

Oh man. Thank you for one of the best movie reviews i've ever had the pleasure of reading.

[JR]

Originally posted by chodadog+Dec 7 2004, 03:30 AM-->