|
Notices |
Legacy Archived Main Board Business chat and general industry chat. All participation is welcome. Dont post your fucking spam here. |
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
11-26-2002 | #1 |
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
Christmas Should Come Once every 5 years
It's just too much hassle, too many pain in the neck things to be responsible for - and if I suggest this - I'm a Scrooge let's look at the things that come every 4 years (besides voodooman) and see how they rate The Olympics - every 4 years it's hard to get excited about athletes from around the world competing If it weren't for the possibility of Nude Women's Curling becoming an Olympic Sport I don't think anyone would care about the Winter Olympics (oh you think you care about the Winter Olympic - ok who won the men's skeleton gold medal? ....... Don't bother to go look it was Jim Shea Jr., a third-generation Olympian) Leap Year - Leap year is almost cool - if anyone had the sense to have a leap year day party Presidential Elections - what a huge fuck-a-row that is, and you don't even have to go to the mall for it and while we're on the subject of the mall - where do all these fucking people come from? (yeah I get the irony of that sentence, they came from fucking) We're talking wall to wall, tree top tall, whoville looking, god awful dressing, no parking, goofballs - did I say no parking - I think half of them are stuck in a holding patten around the mall (how much Holiday goodwill towards man do you see with 4 cars aiming for the one vacant parking spot) And all to get the lovely last minute saving a 1.99 scarf for Aunt Martha who in return is going to give you that same damn fruitcake that has passed through 4 generations in your family (hint, it will make a lovely doorstop) You know the 3 words I fear most ......... (Nope, Not "I Love you") Some Assembly Required Just watch your insane relatives this year See how many arguments Christmas causes ... and in the name of good cheer - how funny is that!!! and nobody gets this one - supposedly Christmas is for Christians to celebrate the birth of Christ KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK - wake up call If you believe the bible Christ was born in October - oh yeah Christ was 33.5 when he died (you wacky fun loving Christians allow your savior to be nailed to a cross .... whoa - there's a new way to say Thanks - that's why Christians will never rule the world - if there's a God he's pissed and saying you dumb fuckers - I give you a savior and you play pin the guy on the cross with him ) and Christ was to have supposed to have died in April Now I don't know what calendar you're using but mine says .5 years = 6 months so April + 6months = October (please don't start with the Christmas was made close to Candlemas to appease the pagans- if you wanted to appease the pagans just throw a body on the yule log) Let's look a Christmas Day it's self Now I have a lovely family, nice people and my in-laws are swell too .......... But, try putting 24 people in 2 rooms that might fit 12 comfortably and have wrapping paper flying, fake happy faces for the fruitcake, kids running and screaming, a dog dancing through, (12 maids a milking) 6 people trying to engage me in conversations I could not care less about, every relative wanted to hold my son (that's right, please pass the germs, I'll have your fucking cold next week, just in time for New Year's thank you very much for that present) and then trying to configure all these people to the dining room and mix for about 2 hours and you can see why I'm getting drunk... oh yeah - I bring my own fifth of Jim Beam Black - and I look forward to passing out - call me a lush - I call me sane and then the best part ..... we get to pack up from my parents and go do it all over again at my wife's parents .... only it's even more crowded Christmas would be good every 5 years .... or maybe not Last edited by Vick at Nov 26 2002, 09:19 PM |
11-26-2002 | #2 |
Members
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Deadwood, you Cocksucker!
Posts: 833
|
Vick. You make me Proud.
Happy Hollow-Daze! Merry Kiss-My-Ass!
__________________
You can't just cut the throat of every Cocksucker who's character it MIGHT improve! |
11-26-2002 | #4 | |
Members
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Hills of N. GA
Posts: 10,823
|
Quote:
I LOVE Christmas - it's always been a time where family that's spread around gets together. And there's nothing like watching a small child get into it Christmas lasts from about 11 AM to 2 AM for my family. We take a good 5-6 hours just unwrapping gifts. My Mom and I buy stuff all year and we'll both wrap anything - including the freebies we get at cosmetic counters Though I was a big concerned to get Webquest's Christmas card in the mail LAST WEEK!! |
|
11-26-2002 | #5 |
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
Peaches - I Love ya but .......
Tell me how much you love Christmas when you're trying to get a parking spot at the mall on December 23, that's after you've been cut off for the first spot you saw ... and that's before you have to push, shove, squeeze and gyrate your way into any stores and that before you get to stand in line for 3 hours at check out only to find a sub-human checkout person who's only hope of getting a clue is if Acme makes one and Wile E Coyote drops the Clue Anvil on his head in fact I say Fuck Christmas .... with that big 10" dildo we hear tell of Last edited by Vick at Nov 26 2002, 01:04 PM |
11-26-2002 | #6 |
Members
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,087
|
jesus Vick is grumpy!
|
11-26-2002 | #7 | |
Members
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Hills of N. GA
Posts: 10,823
|
Quote:
And to show how "Anti Mall at Christmastime" I really am, after 19 years, I have ZERO pictures of my child on Santa's lap - tough for him |
|
11-26-2002 | #8 | ||
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
Quote:
that is unless you're calling me Jesus Vick, in which case I'll pass on the cross thing Quote:
|
||
11-26-2002 | #9 |
Members
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Hills of N. GA
Posts: 10,823
|
Also remember that even though it's been obscured by commercialism, Christmas IS the celebration of Jesus' birth. If we're only going to celebrate HIS birthday every 5 years, then we should only celebrate OURS every five years (or run the risk of REALLY pissing God off :P ). Even though mine's AT Christmas, it would still suck because I enjoy a free meal every year that my parents buy me
|
11-26-2002 | #10 |
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
and I ranted about the Jesus thing too
|
11-26-2002 | #11 |
Banned
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 15,115
|
On advice of my lawyers (having been sued 3 times this year) I would like to wish a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2001, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make Britain great, (not to imply that Britain is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "Britain" in the western hemisphere,) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wishers to actually implement any of the wishes for themselves or others, is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wishers. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wishers. |
11-26-2002 | #12 |
Members
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,087
|
i love Christmas even though i'm a yid, i grew up going to my Aunt Jean's house for Christmas, they were Italian and they had the perfect Christmas, fucking Martha Stewart couldn't have done it up any better than her.
I don't know how people in warm weather places care about Christmas, green Christmases suck. Vick you should convert to Judaism, no more Christmas problems. Tell your kid 'Son, i have some very bad news for you, you're a Jew now. No more Santa Claus for us around here so I don't wanna hear you whining about presents and candy canes. You're a Jew now, act like one and go make your old man rich!' |
11-26-2002 | #13 |
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
might have a problem there Mutt
My son's pretty quick minded and he might come back with Don't I get 8 nights of presents fucking Happy Hanukkah Nice greeting Nick - um ..... wonder if I can get away with borrwing that legally correct holiday wish ... guess I have to call Dewey, Cheatum and Howe |
11-26-2002 | #14 |
Members
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Deadwood, you Cocksucker!
Posts: 833
|
Nick - BOLLOCKS!
__________________
You can't just cut the throat of every Cocksucker who's character it MIGHT improve! |
11-26-2002 | #15 |
Members
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,087
|
Hannukah is a very small holiday in Judaism, it's North American Jews who spoil their kids who have turned it into something of the Jewish Christmas. Hannukah gifts to children are supposed to be very small and not expensive, like that spinning tip they call a dreidel.
I think Americans have Thanksgiving wrong, it's way too close to Christmas. People go home for Thanksgiving then leave and it's almost time to go back home again for Christmas. For people who all live in the same general area that's ok but for families spread out more it's stupid. |
11-26-2002 | #16 | |
Members
Respin bullshit press Your Comments Are Welcomed
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 2,695
|
Quote:
Vick, Whats your take on Thanksgiving??? :P |
|
11-26-2002 | #17 | |
Members
Respin bullshit press Your Comments Are Welcomed
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 2,695
|
Quote:
but its only been a year and a half. |
|
11-26-2002 | #18 | |
Celebrating Company's Success with A Beer From Mini Bar
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Little South of Sanity
Posts: 6,551
|
Quote:
2 words ....... Wild Turkey Actually tomorrow night is one of those national drinking holiday's - Thanksgiving Eve - that and the last Saturday of October - when clocks go back and you get an extra hour of bar time, Also the Saturday before Easter Last edited by Vick at Nov 26 2002, 03:30 PM |
|
11-26-2002 | #19 |
Polishing the Chrome on Bishops Motorcycle
$100 for every ImLive sign-up
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Hell: Bowels : Level 9
Posts: 4,153
|
Do I get extra presents for punching those cosmetic counter bitches???? I'm highly allergic to perfumes and hate running the perfume spray gauntlet from those buimbos with bulbs...spritzing and spraying and gahhhhhhhhhh....I swear, one, just one of those scent hookers sprays me this year, I'll snap and start breaking limbs.....
fuck Christmas, fuck it up it's stupid ass! my in-laws are hillbilies, so Christmas is always sooooooo extra special...gee thanks, a half eaten Snickers bar wrapped in toilet paper, you really shouldn't have gramma Hattie.....really, you shouldn't have.... I'm getting even with these hee haw motherfuckers this year...I'm jerking off in the egg nog............. Merry Fucking Christmas, you Hillbilly fucks!!!!!! damn Vick, this venting thing does make one feel better...... now I gotta plan my strategy of buying my kids toys that I like to play with....this year, the kids get a subscription to Maxim!
__________________
ADULT PAYMASTER - All Site Access - Paying $70 October 5th! "Love your enemies...just in case your friends turn out to be bastards." - unknown |
Bookmarks |
|
|