I am starting new life and here the laws I'll be

[Winetalk.com]

Van Roy's Postulates:

Swallow much but digest little.
Never change diapers in midstream.
When you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.


Jason's Law:
An unbreakable toy is good for breaking other toys.


Chuck's Law:
A small carafe of wine is illogical, immoral, and inadequate.


Pulliam's Postulate:
Never step in anything soft.



Welch's Words:
An honest answer can get you into a lot of trouble.



Ben Franklin's Wisdom:

If a man could have half his wishes, he would double his troubles.
If every fool wore a crown, we would all be kings.



Preston's Postulates:

He who uses bad language is an ignorant shnuck.
Love thy neighbour, but be sure her husband is away.
Two can live as cheaply as one... for half as long.