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Put the toilet seat down when you’re done.
She'll use your razor for her legs.
Panties end up it the strangest of places.
Your mirror won't be good enough.
Be prepared to loose 75% of your wardrobe space.
Originally posted by Trev@May 12 2005, 11:06 PM Put the toilet seat down when you’re done.
She'll use your razor for her legs.
Panties end up it the strangest of places.
Your mirror won't be good enough.
Be prepared to loose 75% of your wardrobe space.
There are so many more but that’s a general idea
Better get used to washing her underwear too
__________________ Sex Story Text If you need words then you need us.
you won't ever really get a guilt-free 'boys night out'
you're going to have to spray that bathroom after you take a dump
you'll feel silly singin in the shower
you'll be sick of living with a girl after 1-3 months and you'll wish you never did it
you'll eventually get so sick of her that you can wait for her friends to come over so u can eye-fuck them and pretend to yourself that her friends are flirting with you and you could bang them if you realllly wanted to
she'll take your parking spaces
she'll park behind you even when she knows damned well you're leaving in 15 minutes
you'll have to watch what you say on the phone
you'll have to watch what you and your friends say while in the house
you'll have to make sure the hooker you banged from the street didnt leave lipstick, hairpin or whatnot in your car before you go home (happened to me when i was married)
youll be expected to mow the lawn in a timely fashion if you dont have a gardner
youll be expected to do stupid shit like wash the windows outside and inside and shit because she cant reach them if you dont have a housekeeper
she will get fat and lazy and you wont know how to tell her to unfuck herself without being a total schmuck
she will slack on her laundry duties or only do her laundry and you'll want to fucking kill her because you really wanted to wear a shirt that you thought was gonna be clean
the ONLY good thing that will become of this, is that you will LOVE the smell of the house right after she takes a shower and uses all those girly good smelling stuff.... gives her a temporary aura of being from another planet where maybe, just MAYBE living with a woman is GREAT...
Originally posted by kmanrox@May 13 2005, 09:18 AM you'll eventually get so sick of her that you can wait for her friends to come over so u can eye-fuck them and pretend to yourself that her friends are flirting with you and you could bang them if you realllly wanted to...
Originally posted by Trev@May 12 2005, 11:06 PM Put the toilet seat down when you’re done.
She'll use your razor for her legs.
Panties end up it the strangest of places.
Your mirror won't be good enough.
Be prepared to loose 75% of your wardrobe space.
There are so many more but that’s a general idea
Yup, yup, yup.
A few more:
You'll have to eat healthily and follow the latest diet, unless it's her that wants to pig out on chips etc.
You'll discover at least 6 varieties of bubble bath in the bathroom.
Your mess is because you're disgustingly untidy, her mess is also your fault in some way.
Your body is just a portable warmer for her cold feet.
You'll need to buy your own wardrobe and chest of drawers.
damn I'm starting to think my girlfriend is even cooler than I thought, because I don't think hardly any of those will be a problem. I guess i'll know in about 17 hours.
I don't know where she's going to put her clothes though, I've got them all in garbage bags in storage, along with all her desk and other crap I don't have room for. I suppoooose I can put some of my winter clothes in storage.....
Originally posted by pushpills@May 13 2005, 10:42 AM damn I'm starting to think my girlfriend is even cooler than I thought, because I don't think hardly any of those will be a problem. I guess i'l know in about 17 hours.
I don't know where she's going to put her clothes though, I've got them all in garbage bags in storage, along with all her desk and other crap I don't have room for. I suppoooose I can put some of my winter clothes in storage.....
2 weeks from now you'll shit at how much space she has and how little space you have
Originally posted by pushpills@May 13 2005, 01:42 AM damn I'm starting to think my girlfriend is even cooler than I thought, because I don't think hardly any of those will be a problem. I guess i'l know in about 17 hours.
Originally posted by Winetalk.com@May 13 2005, 04:55 AM does she cook?
yea she can make some nice meals when she's not busy with schoolwork and shit. since she's not in school right now she'll have pleanty of time to cook and clean. not to mention she's paying rent too! (although it's not exactly half, but who cares.)
Originally posted by Vick@May 13 2005, 06:58 AM First of all you have to set the rules or you will get some of the BS that you've read it this thread
And how some of you ever put up with all that nonsense I'll never understand (however funny it may be)
But then what the fuck do I know
I've never had a successful relationship
Listen to Vick... Besides most women really love dickheads, you just have to be the right kind of a dickhead.
Kind of dickhead to be ...
1) Can you get this damn laundry done it isn't going to do itself
2) I pay all the fucking bills around here the least you could do is let me relax in the fucking garage without your ass yapping at me about the mess I made downstairs. Clean it up and shut the hell up.
3) You think you can use sex against me any more? Shit !! (reverse psychology works lol)
4) We'll buy that next week I want this this week.. And learn to repeat it every week....
5) Spend your own damn money on it then (that's a big one)
6) I'll take one closet if I want to for fuck sake (literally it's 5X3 no dressers nada)
Lsit goes on, then again I don't love the women I'm with... Treat her like total shit and she won't ever leave me as we are stuck together for a while. Maybe once I hit Eureka again and she stablizes mentally she will move out. In the mean time I could... and actually do ... Tell her to fuck off quite regularly, it's actually empowering as I remember all the times I used to want to with my ex and sometimes I'll tell her to fuck off for NO REASON thinking about how pissed I used to get at my ex and couldn't say it to her... reaplacement therapy or whatever the hell it's called
Kind of dickhead not to be ...
1) You are a lazy 'fat ass'
2) You fucking god damn whore (Whore word tends to be a no no)
3) I don't want to go over there your mom is a god damn bitch
4) Yes you do! But... You look fat in EVERYTHING you fucking wear so what does it matter?
5) Well just whip something up quick.. your supposed to be int he kitchen atleast an hour a day.. This $20 is going to beer damnit
The list goes on... I have said everything above and many things that were much more stupid when I was 'under the influence' of mind altering substances, you have to watch your honesty level when you get messed up man... LOL
Question 1. If it's THAT fucking important why don't you put the seat down when you come into the bathroom, and then put the fucking thing back up when YOU'RE done???? Jesus Christ, it's a fucking toilet seat already... give it a rest.
Question 2. I've had this suit on for two fucking hours while I wait for you to get ready. Do you REALLY need to wait until we're walking out the door to say "you're not wearing that tie, are you?"
Question 3. Why do I have to do that right this fucking second? Can't you see I'm covered in grease from changing the oil in your car?
flame away ladies... and you all think I'm such a nice easygoing guy...
Could go on forever on this subject but other duties are calling (2 shows tonight, back to back)
Teach her to appreciate good beer, good wings and good football - you will anyway
She'll get sex (including blowjobs) anytime she wants and anytime you want
Get the lifetime chanel blocked
If you want another to have sex with another women agree that you'll bring her home
My advice is to date/marry a much younger woman and keep her finacially dependant upon you (to some degree) and she is to be the homemaker (which is a very tough job, no kidding!)
and it's always your way
(yes I am a asshole and the first to admit it!!)
and always - HAVE FUN!!
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KC and I rarely fight. We both go out with friends and trust eachother enough to not get jealous. Even though Im with him 24/7 he is the person I like to spend my time with the most. He cracks me up everyday and we have the most fun together. Standard household chores are easy to deal with. I cook, he takes me out etc.
My best advice is to never say the things you cant take back. If you are fighting just remind yourself that even though you are pissed, this is the girl you love and respect.
On a side note......Im on the pill and take 3-4 months at a time skipping the sugar pill so I will skip my period. This means I dont get PMS which could definitely contribute to how mellow I am, lol
Originally posted by MissEve@May 13 2005, 11:27 AM Jesus, you guys need cooler girls to live with
KC and I rarely fight. We both go out with friends and trust eachother enough to not get jealous. Even though Im with him 24/7 he is the person I like to spend my time with the most. He cracks me up everyday and we have the most fun together. Standard household chores are easy to deal with. I cook, he takes me out etc.
My best advice is to never say the things you cant take back. If you are fighting just remind yourself that even though you are pissed, this is the girl you love and respect.
On a side note......Im on the pill and take 3-4 months at a time skipping the sugar pill so I will skip my period. This means I dont get PMS which could definitely contribute to how mellow I am, lol
You have found the secret Miss Eve
Women are bitchy the week before and recovering the week after.. then you have the week of.
Shit that's 3 out of four weeks.. I'm going to replace the current Misses's placebos with real ones... LOL (Can you get real ones that are the color of placebos? ha)
Originally posted by pushpills@May 13 2005, 01:42 AM damn I'm starting to think my girlfriend is even cooler than I thought, because I don't think hardly any of those will be a problem. I guess i'll know in about 17 hours.
I don't know where she's going to put her clothes though, I've got them all in garbage bags in storage, along with all her desk and other crap I don't have room for. I suppoooose I can put some of my winter clothes in storage.....
i dont date women who dont like sports on face value. thats a stupid generalization. most women will like whatever sport you like if you take the time to include them in it. Hell i was engaged to a brazilian and turned her into a football/baseball/basketball fan by taking her to games, explaining all the rules (she didn't know any, being raised on futbol) and including her in a gameday experience. now shes a rabid fan. and I in turn, got into Brazilian soccer. (it helped that i have a 2 decade background in american soccer, but still)
Women are very much more open minded than men. Inclusion is the key. How many of you could say that you would adopt the hobbies of a woman over time, and not begrudgingly.
Originally posted by grimm@May 13 2005, 02:44 PM How many of you could say that you would adopt the hobbies of a woman over time, and not begrudgingly.
Could you keep yr posts shorter , reading them make me drop stitches....
i could not take it any longer and we made an arrangement that she moves out of my house, thought i would be very sad about it, but just now i realized i had a smile on my face consistently for the past 2 weeks
first date in a while, had to take pics , although she spilled pinot noir on my nice carpet grrr
i see many parallels between vick and myself, some things you cannot compromise on, if you like a high level of freedom/independence as I do, living with a female is tough