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Old 08-19-2004   #1
Almighty Colin
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Why did the chicken cross the road?

GEORGE W BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. Our side of the road is the right side of the road and the chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground for any chicken.

COLIN POWELL
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

DONALD RUMSFELD
I have known about the chicken crossing the road for several months. I was investigating why the chicken moved but didn't feel it was necessary to alert anyone.

HANS BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now against it!

RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens
crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build road for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any inside information.

DR SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die in the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was a historic inevitability.

SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just witnessed eChicken2004, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook... and Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE
That was my chicken! I invented the chicken.

COLONEL SANDERS
Did I miss one?
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Old 08-19-2004   #2
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Old 08-19-2004   #3
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Classic.

They're gettin spammed to all my friends as we speak now, cheers
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Old 08-19-2004   #4
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Nice one.... I enjoyed that.
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Old 08-19-2004   #5
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If you pick on everyone equally no one ever seems to mind ;-)
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Old 08-19-2004   #6
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too good! haha...I've sent it to a few of my contacts too....

And so true Colin....as long as everyone's picked on equally, everyone's happy....lolol
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Old 08-19-2004   #7
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WISEMAN
So I could throw a chair at it.
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Old 08-19-2004   #8
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Wiseman

I have no recollection of the Chicken. I blacked out


Hooper

The chicken was a consultant , not an employee.





;-))))
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Old 08-19-2004   #9
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dravyk , great minds....

LOL
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Old 08-19-2004   #10
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h34r: FREE THE CHICKEN!!!! h34r:
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Old 08-19-2004   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nickatilynx@Aug 19 2004, 01:40 PM
dravyk , great minds....

LOL
Yup! Scary, ain't it? :P LMAO!
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Old 08-19-2004   #12
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Brad "little weasel" Tukhman Shaw

A chicken? Hmmm I like that idea...I'll get one.

Serge

The chicken was avoiding the broom

gonzo

It is a spcially trained donut seeking chicken

Me

I gotta steal that chicken!!!




;-))))
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Old 08-19-2004   #13
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We have elevated the alert level to Orange for both sides of the road. The chicken has been taken to Guantanamo Bay to determine its reasons for crossing the road.

Tom Ridge

...so you see, the chicken was crossing the road to see the rooster that left her behind in the big war. And that, my friends ............ is the rest of the story.

Paul Harvey
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Old 08-19-2004   #14
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SERGE
Chicken, he crossed road to see my art. But he became dinner.

NICK
So I could pluck him.

LAWRENCE CONNER
The chicken obviously wanted to come over to my side of the road to stare at my enormously hard super-star pecker!

ACACIA
We have a patent on crossing the road. The chicken is in violation and our attorneys will be contacting the chicken shortly and seize 5% of her eggs.

DOJ
The chick is obviously under 18. Show us your papers.
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Old 08-19-2004   #15
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DEAR GEORGE TENET,

Don't count your chickens before they hatch
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Old 08-19-2004   #16
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I had a good laugh lol funny man
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Old 08-19-2004   #17
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About 5 yrs ago when my youngest was 5 yrs old, we'd been up to grab some supplies from the pub near where we used to live, and decided to take a drive down past our old house.

As we were leaving the estate, we turned a corner and there was a chicken...crossing the road.

The driver (an ex who shall remain nameless) stopped the car to avoid hitting it...and Jordie wound down his window and started screaming 'WHY CHICKEN? YOU HAVE TO TELL US! WHY ARE YOU CROSSING THE ROAD? WE NEED TO KNOW!'

Was the funniest thing coming from a 5 yr old...and I was just sitting there wondering how the hell it happened that I was just driving along and ended up in the middle of a joke.
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Old 08-19-2004   #18
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MEATMAN
The cunting bird was probably just trying to be a fucking fucker

;-))))))))))
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Old 08-19-2004   #19
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lisa@Aug 19 2004, 08:01 PM
About 5 yrs ago when my youngest was 5 yrs old, we'd been up to grab some supplies from the pub near where we used to live, and decided to take a drive down past our old house.

As we were leaving the estate, we turned a corner and there was a chicken...crossing the road.

The driver (an ex who shall remain nameless) stopped the car to avoid hitting it...and Jordie wound down his window and started screaming 'WHY CHICKEN? YOU HAVE TO TELL US! WHY ARE YOU CROSSING THE ROAD? WE NEED TO KNOW!'

Was the funniest thing coming from a 5 yr old...and I was just sitting there wondering how the hell it happened that I was just driving along and ended up in the middle of a joke.

Excellent!
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Old 08-19-2004   #20
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funny stuff!!
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Old 08-21-2004   #21
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"Let's all talk freely about why we think it crossed road for the benefit of everyone who owns or is thinking of owning a chicken"
~Adult Webmasters 1997

"Fuck you and your chicken... pay me"
~Adult Webmasters 2004
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Old 08-21-2004   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by XXXPhoto@Aug 21 2004, 05:24 AM
"Let's all talk freely about why we think it crossed road for the benefit of everyone who owns or is thinking of owning a chicken"
~Adult Webmasters 1997

"Fuck you and your chicken... pay me"
~Adult Webmasters 2004
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