Cursed Fortune Cookies

[EroticySteve]

So we ordered Chinese today. Among my favorite meals.

I finish off an order of Chow Ho Fun. (Highly recommended)

I get to the fortune cookie. Boy was I excited, especially since I like to play the #'s in lotto drawings.

I open it and wouldn't you know it.... The damn thing says "pick another fortune cookie".

Only moments before I was joking with co-workers about how mine would say something like. "Dude, don't leave the house tomorrow".

[MorganGrayson]

Wow. That would totally freak me. I've never gotten a fortune cookie that didn't assure me all would be right with my little world.

There's an "all you can eat" Chinese buffet in our little town and we loved to take the kids there while they were growing up. (We were blessed with kids who could hold up their end of a conversation, so they were fun to take places.) Occasionally, Mom and Dad would get impossibly romantic fortune cookies that would allow the kids to make that "ewwww!!!" noise they do so love to make...but "pick another fortune cookie"???? Yikes.

I didn't think the fortune cookie people did things like that.

[Mr Benn]

Originally Posted by MorganGrayson

but "pick another fortune cookie"???? Yikes.

I didn't think the fortune cookie people did things like that.

Makes sense to me - if you include 10 of those messages for every 100 fortune cookies made, you could have between 1 - 10 people asking for another fortune cookie.

Voila, 1%-10% increase in sales

[Funbrunette]

I think I only ever had a REALLY good one once! I still carry it in my wallet...Don't pay too much attention to it, or use the excuse to stay in bed all day tomorrow and "vedge"

[MorganGrayson]

Originally Posted by Mr Benn

Makes sense to me - if you include 10 of those messages for every 100 fortune cookies made, you could have between 1 - 10 people asking for another fortune cookie.

Voila, 1%-10% increase in sales

Mr. Benn, you got 5 points for being able to keep your eye on the business ball, so-to-speak.

I'm sending myself to the corner for not thinking of that....

[Red]

Pick another fortune cookie?

That is really strange. I have eaten in hundreds of chinese restaurants in 10 states for more years than I care to admit and I have never seen that in a cookie.

[EroticySteve]

I have friends who enjoy adding, "in bed" at the end of whatever the fortune cookie says.

So mine today would have been "Pick another fortune cookie in bed" Not so amusing.

[Dravyk]

I like messing with people. So when someone says "What's your message say?" I'll read them only a part of it and make it sound like something else.

Like "Uh oh. It says people are after me, their going to find me." "What? That's not what it says." And then they take it from me and read "People will find you a charming person to be with."

Or I'll open it up and give out a sorta sexual "mmm" sound and say "Oh, it says I'm going to be on top". "No it doesn't, give me that!" And it says "You're on top of the world."

[justb]

Originally Posted by EroticySteve

I have friends who enjoy adding, "in bed" at the end of whatever the fortune cookie says.

So mine today would have been "Pick another fortune cookie in bed" Not so amusing.

I love that game!

[SykkBoy]

Originally Posted by justb

I love that game!

me too, except mine ends with "in my pants"

[EroticySteve]

I keep good fortunes and I play the lottery numbers. I am confident my #'s will come up eventually. When that happens, expect that I'll take some well deserved time off.

Yes, "Pick another fortune cookie" is the strangest I've seen yet.

I keep good ones in my wallet or wear it under a ball cap for good luck.

I'm a bit superstitious and I like to think that perhaps it's a divine sign that a good fortune comes my way. Unfortunately, should it not be a good fortune I fear the consequences.

Oh the fortune cookie that said, "Pick another fortune cookie" I spit that one out in the trash. I'm not taking any chances.

[gigi]

That IS strange!

We went for Chinese last week, and my friend, who's quite a character, opens his up. The lotto numbers were face up and he says, "Look! I got the waitress' phone number!"

Might have been a 'had to be there' thing...but it was hilarious and the tables around us chuckled along with us....

[SykkBoy]

There's a new chinese place that just opened across the street from the office...amazing food, only about 5% round eyes in a fully packed restuarant and no fortune cookies after the meal...gotta love a place like that (except the round eyes complaining "where's my damn fortune cookie?" lol)

[Red]

Originally Posted by SykkBoy

There's a new chinese place that just opened across the street from the office...amazing food, only about 5% round eyes in a fully packed restuarant and no fortune cookies after the meal...gotta love a place like that (except the round eyes complaining "where's my damn fortune cookie?" lol)

That's so true. The first time I was in San Francisco and went to Chinatown we found this little out of the way restaurant with not a round eye in the place. Best Chinese food I've ever had.

[SykkBoy]

Originally Posted by Red

That's so true. The first time I was in San Francisco and went to Chinatown we found this little out of the way restaurant with not a round eye in the place. Best Chinese food I've ever had.

yup, although I think I was a victim of racial profiling...the waitress quietly slipped beside me and placed a fork on the table...

[Dravyk]

Originally Posted by SykkBoy

yup, although I think I was a victim of racial profiling...the waitress quietly slipped beside me and placed a fork on the table...

That is so very common in Chinese restaurants! I heard it's because they (natch) want to get people in and out and the damn Occidentals take so long fumbling with the sticks, the restaurant could have the table turned over with new folks three times over. ... And I believe it!

Actually my older brother is very proficient with chop sticks. He'll go into a restaurant ask for sticks and they give him a dirty look. He starts using them and five minutes later the staff are all smiling at him and nodding assuredly.

[Newton]

[Funbrunette]

Originally Posted by Newton

My worst fucking nightmare...lol

[EroticySteve]

Originally Posted by Newton

That's pretty much how that fortune hit me yesterday.

[EroticySteve]

Continuing on Chinese food.

My last trip to NC with co-workers allowed us an opportunity for a great meal in Chinatown. Our per diem would have allowed us the finest surf and turf, so instead we opted for Chinese and got about one of everthing.

We had a ton of leftovers. Instead of taking them back to the hotel we decided to take them and give them to someone homeless.

We walked back to Times Square, the whole group of us. During our entire trek we didn't see one homeless person. Not a single one. The weather was perfect and we walked through some pretty seedy neighborhoods.

We ended up just leaving the food on a street corner, not 50 feet from the food some kid kicked the bag into the street where a Taxi quickly rolled over all of the leftover Moo Goo Gai Pan.

[Dravyk]

Originally Posted by EroticySteve

Continuing on Chinese food.

My last trip to NC with co-workers allowed us an opportunity for a great meal in Chinatown. Our per diem would have allowed us the finest surf and turf, so instead we opted for Chinese and got about one of everthing.

We had a ton of leftovers. Instead of taking them back to the hotel we decided to take them and give them to someone homeless.

We walked back to Times Square, the whole group of us. During our entire trek we didn't see one homeless person. Not a single one. The weather was perfect and we walked through some pretty seedy neighborhoods.

We ended up just leaving the food on a street corner, not 50 feet from the food some kid kicked the bag into the street where a Taxi quickly rolled over all of the leftover Moo Goo Gai Pan.

Never a pan-handling smelly bum around when you need one!