After we board the plane, we get a quick lesson in why Delta is in bankruptcy.
Airtran flies for the same or less money with a nice shiney new fleet of 717's and 737's. For a puddle jumper flight like this one, Delta has an aging MD-88 fleet. In fact, Delta's whole fleet is aging.
Now first thing you notice is that for all of Delta's domestic flights that do not cross ocean, their first class configuration gives you a 18.5" wide seat. Yup, bout the same as Coach. Airtran gives you 22.5". One notable exception for Delta is the 757-200, you get 22" seat on that one cause they couldn't figure out how to shoe horn one more seat in each row in first.
That's problem number one.
Now just as they are doing final pre-flight checks, the plane is loaded, we're ready to shut the door, the pilot comes on and says the co-pilots airspeed indicator has failed. They'll need a replacement. They're gonna raid one from a plane that is out of service and should have it installed in about 30 minutes and be underway.
Let the bitching begin.
They did at least give us water and entertain us with some of the most godawful muzak versions of classic rock you'll ever hear. Somewhere Steve Miller is really really pissed off about what they did to his song.
GonZo was not kidding about Raven being on our flight. He's been eating like we have apparently. And his head is one big scar at this point. His only comment about Delta was "nevermore".
35 minutes later...
The head inflight waitress comes on and says she's sorry she has no idea what's going on....that's comforting. They have a guy there to install the part, but the part hasn't shown up and they dont know where it is. It's straight up lunchtime, we figure union labor stopped for a samitch.
More bitching by all involved.
Now it's at this point that I should mention this flight is packed. When we planned the dates for this trip we tried to pick on that wasn't crowded to keep things cheap fast and easy for everyone. We missed one thing. The SEC championship game was Saturday night at the Dome and would't you know Arkansas was in it. Now imagine the fun of sitting with a bunch of pissed off, hung over razorbacks on a delayed flight.
Sssssssssssoooooooooooooooooooooooooo---eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee------piiiiiiggggggggggggggggggg
Around 15 minutes past the time we were shceduled to land in Memphis the part is finally here, installed, and we push back and are off.
They were nice to us. Plenty to drink, I even got a small bag of peanuts! I suspect even coach was getting to drink for free by this point.
Something I should mention about all that drinking....GonZo didn't go before we left the Crown Room. Nor did he try to squeeze his fat ass into a MD-88 toilet. All that liquid refreshment and the whole time we're on final all I can hear is "peeeee pee".
When we stood up, he started doing the pee pee dance like a 4 year old.
Welcome to Memphis, this was our first stop!
