[RyanLanane]

Learned alot by making this post, that much I can definitely say. I would also have to say it was one of the most 'hopping' topics brought to this baord in a while...

I will admit it will alter the way I handle things a little bit but for the main part I will stay as I am. Alot of you really are comparing apples to oranges here. I would have no problems (now at least) doing any of the things Nick mentioned were 'immoral' but huge money makers. Such as spam, etc.. Now I would though, as my ass wil end up in jail.

I am not here to defend myself, to all of you who have said.. "Failure"

You're right - I can't deny it. I have failed myself and my family in alot of ways, mainly myself.... I haven't been able to find where I really feel I belong in the business world yet - although honestly I am really starting to get a good feel for what I would be excellent at.

Unless a major company gives me a chance though, will take some college at least. My chance with the one major company is coming up tomorrow evening when I have a phone call with someone that has been set in place for 10 days. I hope I can convince him I have the qualities I have picked up on having the last 2-3 months.. and show him how it will improve his company's botom line.

I have no problem being an asshoe and firing people - I have no problem being an asshole to a boss I disagree with if I feel I have no idea what in the hell they want - I have no problem with growing a set of brass and using it.

I just choose where to use it differently then some do - I belong in a situation where I have an underling to do the type of shit you guys can do day in and out... That way it doesn't weight on my concious. Not self reghteous, just who I am and how I feel .. Good or Bad ..

P.S. 10 Years down the road I very well may say 'fuck that - thinking like that cost me millions' but right now it's how I feel... so until then ...