Obtain some Nair for Men (Rite Aid, Walgreens, etc)
Lay back and get yourself in the "nose bleed" position.
Put a glob in left nostril.
Wait the appropriate amount of time.
Got outside.
Put right index finger over the right nostril.
Blow hairy snot rocket over the bushes.
Go back inside.
Repeat process on the other side.
Don't do both at once, makes it too difficult to do effective snot rockets.
The nose and ear trimmer things work fine too.
