the Bible recommends the following:

Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she's yours.
-- Deuterononmy (Deuteronomy 21:11-13)

Find a prostitute and marry her.
-- Hosea (Hosea 1:1-3)

Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his flock.
-- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)

Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.
-- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)

Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife.
-- Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)

Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will cost you a rib.
-- Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)

Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's hand in marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another seven years for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That's right. Fourteen years of toil for a woman.
-- Jacob (Genesis 29:15-30)

Cut off 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law's enemies and get his daughter for a wife.
-- David (I Samuel 18:27)

Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'll definitely find someone. (It's all relative of course.)
-- Cain (Genesis 4:16-17)

Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest.
-- Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)

When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "I have seen a ...woman; now get her for me." If your parents question your decision, simply say, "Get her for me. She's the one for me."
-- Samson (Judges 14:1-3)

Kill any husband and take HIS wife. (Prepare to lose four sons though).
-- David (2 Samuel 11)

Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's not just a good idea, it's the law).
-- Onan and Boaz (Deuteronomy or Leviticus, example in Ruth)

Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity.
-- Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)

A wife?...NOT!!!
-- Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)

On the question of whether to marry, I've always liked this one ...

"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." - Socrates

Go around town dropping $100 bills wherever you walk. You'll find a wife soon enough. :P

I found that teaching the beautiful girl you work with how to update sites, make galleries and edit video works very well…

Will be 3 years in 2 weeks :P

Bastard.

I married a beautiful woman who was a professional chef and who is a whore in bed. :D

Bastard.[/b][/quote]
:nyanya:

:nyanya: [/b][/quote]
Go to Hell.

I even think of asking one of the girls out at work and I get everyone and their brother telling me it's a bad idea.

Bleh.

Who cares what they think... what do YOU think about the idea?

After hearing said advice, I too thought it was a bad idea.

After hearing said advice, I too thought it was a bad idea. [/b][/quote]
Next time just do it before anyone has a chance to offer you any advice...

Next time just do it before anyone has a chance to offer you any advice... [/b][/quote]
Too late.

Too late. [/b][/quote]
<sigh>

Just be normal and you'll find out the right girl...

just take the cash out of your pocket and throw it on the ground ... the one girl left standing and not scurrying around on the pavement is the one for you =)

I found getting mine young and harassing the shit out of her till she couldn't think straight worked like a charm...

:blink:

Hmmmmmmmmm... I really think I need to find me a wife...

They are so much more useful than husbands are :)


Sabby:)

The best way to find a wife is...don't look for one.

P.S. If you marry, marry an ugly woman who knows how to cook!