dantheman
12-07-2003, 07:11 PM
sent to me from a sooner board,
----------------------------------------------------
I shot my Sony KV37RS26 from 8 feet away w/ a Winchester Model 70HV 223 REM. firing a Winchester CXP2 53 gr. hollow point round.
Just so we are all clear, this was not some sick, deranged and demented act of a drunken Sooner fanatic. No, this was an act of a very sober Sooner fanatic. And, no, I was not meting out punishment on the TV for any real or imagined insult. This was a compassion killing: euthanasia. That blessed TV had given me too much pleasure and served me too well to let it going on suffering like it was after that game last night. I knew the poor machine would pretend and try to act as if everything was OK but we have together too long for it to fool me. My Grandfather had to put down his favorite Tennessee Walker once and my Grandmnother said he never got over it. I'm afraid I now know what he went through and how he felt. But these things are for the best and we must do our duty when called upon and make the tough decisions, do the right thing. After forcing that fine and faithful TV to display that vile abortion of a game it had been poisoned beyond any hope of recovery. I am so to blame. West Austin Sooner asked me to come over and watch it w/ him as did many of my UT classmates("hey Curtis, come over lets all watch it together. When are WE ever ALL gonna be rooting for the Sooners again! This is a rare and special occasion! Bring it!). But no. Adam (you old-timers might remember Adam, he is a huge and healthy 14 year old and has been off chemo. for almost 5 years now) never watched a football game w/ me until this year's Alabama game. Now that he plays Jr. High ball he gets into the games now and wanted to watch the BIG GAME w/ dad! Too cool! PRICELESS, as they say in the Visa ads. So now you all understand. I had no choice and it was the only humane thing to do. We did give it a proper burial this morning. We lovingly wrapped it in finest black Glad double thick trash bags and gently interned it in the bottom of the dumpster at the HEB down the street in Bee Cave. Visiting hours are from 1-4pm this afternoon. Rest in Peace old friend. I can only hope the angels above use that fine instrument to watch Dallas defeat Philadelphia today.
As for the academic question some of you may ask as to what happens when the high velocity and utterly flat trajectory of a 223 bullet propelled by 53 grains of powder is directed at a large Sony tube TV? I can say that it was painless. We put on a tape of the 2000 UT game and waited until the middle ot the second quarter. During a Quentin Griffin run the fatal blow was delivered. My Sony went out in the most respectful way I could arrange. I know thats how it would have wanted it. I can only hope that when my time comes I go as peacefully. As some of you probably know a 223 is very, very fast but small. So the hole in the in the back of the Ethan Allen entertainment center is small as well. As are the holes in the the sheetrock. Where it passed through my daugheter's closet it shredded some jeans but she likes that "distressed look" in her clothing anyway. Breaking a mirror on the inside of her closet door(that now has peep hole in it) it missing an anime poster(if you don't have a 17 year old daughter I won't be able to explain that) by inches before it put a larger hole in the sheetrock on the other side of her room and stopping at the inside of the brick exterior.
I did call my friend B.C. who is a Travis County District Attorney and asked if I had broken any laws. She told me of the "Mack Brown Precedent" and cited several local cases where the DA's office refused to prosecute individuals in Austin who in the privacy of their own homes discharged firearms at their TV's during a UT football game. She said "We just figure that there's as good a chance of a stray round hitting ol' Mack Brown himself as anyone else and in that case it'd be just as justifiable as all hell". I know she made that up but I thought it was clever as hell. What she really said was "You had better not ever do that again and what the hell is an anime poster?"
As for the clothes. Well all you know where I'm coming from here. My spastic sister who is an OSU grad and fanatic is married to the greatest guy in the world and who is an awesome OU grad and huge fan(I'm born and raised in OKC and married a gal from South Texas so these things happen). They sent me an early x-mas gift and ask that I open it early. I don't like to open presents early. They insisted; for The Game. It was nice long sleeved red cotton pin point shirt w/ the embroidered OU logo. I wear the cursed thing unstead of my trusty, neverfail indomitable favorite GAMEDAY SOONER SHIRT. Thinking back on it causes more anguish than I can bear. What did I do to my Sooners? Look at all the misery I caused my Sooner Nation Bretheren & Sisters.
That spiteful witch of a sister of mine put one of her voodoo spells on that shirt because of what we did to her Cowboys. I only wore it because my brother-in-law's name was on the card. I now realized that it had to have been forged. My sister can be treacherous that way. She would even try to cheat our Grandmother at Old Maid. So now it should be clear to you. Every stitch of clothing I had on, including my favorite L.L.Bean slippers had to go. Screw the burn ban. We are all active Boy Scouts here. This was a very safe burn. We made certain none of that voodoo smoke went near anyone nor anyone's home. We were able to direct it toward College Station (I am a Longhorn afterall) though I doubt it will get that far. Anyway we are CLEANSED here in Austin or at least as well I can. Actually I'm afraid that even if we go on to win it all there will still be a bit of a stench around here until we clobber the Longhorns again. Thats better than any spring rain.
AND I STILL HAVE MY FOUR ROOMS AT THE ROYAL SONESTA ON BOURBON STREET FOR JAN. 2-4. I HAD BETTER SEe ALL OF YOU THERE. WE WILL BE NATIONAL CHAMPS.
ROLL ON BIG RED
UTGRAD OUFAN
AUSTIN, TX
P.S. If any of you doubt a word of this is made up go look in the dumpster behind the H.E.B grocery store at the corner of HWY 71 and Bee Cace Rd(RM2244) in Bee Cave TX. The dry wall guys come in the morning.
----------------------------------------------------
I shot my Sony KV37RS26 from 8 feet away w/ a Winchester Model 70HV 223 REM. firing a Winchester CXP2 53 gr. hollow point round.
Just so we are all clear, this was not some sick, deranged and demented act of a drunken Sooner fanatic. No, this was an act of a very sober Sooner fanatic. And, no, I was not meting out punishment on the TV for any real or imagined insult. This was a compassion killing: euthanasia. That blessed TV had given me too much pleasure and served me too well to let it going on suffering like it was after that game last night. I knew the poor machine would pretend and try to act as if everything was OK but we have together too long for it to fool me. My Grandfather had to put down his favorite Tennessee Walker once and my Grandmnother said he never got over it. I'm afraid I now know what he went through and how he felt. But these things are for the best and we must do our duty when called upon and make the tough decisions, do the right thing. After forcing that fine and faithful TV to display that vile abortion of a game it had been poisoned beyond any hope of recovery. I am so to blame. West Austin Sooner asked me to come over and watch it w/ him as did many of my UT classmates("hey Curtis, come over lets all watch it together. When are WE ever ALL gonna be rooting for the Sooners again! This is a rare and special occasion! Bring it!). But no. Adam (you old-timers might remember Adam, he is a huge and healthy 14 year old and has been off chemo. for almost 5 years now) never watched a football game w/ me until this year's Alabama game. Now that he plays Jr. High ball he gets into the games now and wanted to watch the BIG GAME w/ dad! Too cool! PRICELESS, as they say in the Visa ads. So now you all understand. I had no choice and it was the only humane thing to do. We did give it a proper burial this morning. We lovingly wrapped it in finest black Glad double thick trash bags and gently interned it in the bottom of the dumpster at the HEB down the street in Bee Cave. Visiting hours are from 1-4pm this afternoon. Rest in Peace old friend. I can only hope the angels above use that fine instrument to watch Dallas defeat Philadelphia today.
As for the academic question some of you may ask as to what happens when the high velocity and utterly flat trajectory of a 223 bullet propelled by 53 grains of powder is directed at a large Sony tube TV? I can say that it was painless. We put on a tape of the 2000 UT game and waited until the middle ot the second quarter. During a Quentin Griffin run the fatal blow was delivered. My Sony went out in the most respectful way I could arrange. I know thats how it would have wanted it. I can only hope that when my time comes I go as peacefully. As some of you probably know a 223 is very, very fast but small. So the hole in the in the back of the Ethan Allen entertainment center is small as well. As are the holes in the the sheetrock. Where it passed through my daugheter's closet it shredded some jeans but she likes that "distressed look" in her clothing anyway. Breaking a mirror on the inside of her closet door(that now has peep hole in it) it missing an anime poster(if you don't have a 17 year old daughter I won't be able to explain that) by inches before it put a larger hole in the sheetrock on the other side of her room and stopping at the inside of the brick exterior.
I did call my friend B.C. who is a Travis County District Attorney and asked if I had broken any laws. She told me of the "Mack Brown Precedent" and cited several local cases where the DA's office refused to prosecute individuals in Austin who in the privacy of their own homes discharged firearms at their TV's during a UT football game. She said "We just figure that there's as good a chance of a stray round hitting ol' Mack Brown himself as anyone else and in that case it'd be just as justifiable as all hell". I know she made that up but I thought it was clever as hell. What she really said was "You had better not ever do that again and what the hell is an anime poster?"
As for the clothes. Well all you know where I'm coming from here. My spastic sister who is an OSU grad and fanatic is married to the greatest guy in the world and who is an awesome OU grad and huge fan(I'm born and raised in OKC and married a gal from South Texas so these things happen). They sent me an early x-mas gift and ask that I open it early. I don't like to open presents early. They insisted; for The Game. It was nice long sleeved red cotton pin point shirt w/ the embroidered OU logo. I wear the cursed thing unstead of my trusty, neverfail indomitable favorite GAMEDAY SOONER SHIRT. Thinking back on it causes more anguish than I can bear. What did I do to my Sooners? Look at all the misery I caused my Sooner Nation Bretheren & Sisters.
That spiteful witch of a sister of mine put one of her voodoo spells on that shirt because of what we did to her Cowboys. I only wore it because my brother-in-law's name was on the card. I now realized that it had to have been forged. My sister can be treacherous that way. She would even try to cheat our Grandmother at Old Maid. So now it should be clear to you. Every stitch of clothing I had on, including my favorite L.L.Bean slippers had to go. Screw the burn ban. We are all active Boy Scouts here. This was a very safe burn. We made certain none of that voodoo smoke went near anyone nor anyone's home. We were able to direct it toward College Station (I am a Longhorn afterall) though I doubt it will get that far. Anyway we are CLEANSED here in Austin or at least as well I can. Actually I'm afraid that even if we go on to win it all there will still be a bit of a stench around here until we clobber the Longhorns again. Thats better than any spring rain.
AND I STILL HAVE MY FOUR ROOMS AT THE ROYAL SONESTA ON BOURBON STREET FOR JAN. 2-4. I HAD BETTER SEe ALL OF YOU THERE. WE WILL BE NATIONAL CHAMPS.
ROLL ON BIG RED
UTGRAD OUFAN
AUSTIN, TX
P.S. If any of you doubt a word of this is made up go look in the dumpster behind the H.E.B grocery store at the corner of HWY 71 and Bee Cace Rd(RM2244) in Bee Cave TX. The dry wall guys come in the morning.