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Buff
10-20-2003, 09:57 PM
Washington -- Monday, Buff announced that the Patent Office approved his patents on every single heterosexual sex act and masturbation. Buff now owns the right to license these acts at his discretion.

Note: In 1999 Buff patented the letter "N", the word "hat", every sound made by the nose, and 473,000 numbers between -65 and 2,279,999,074,116; he also owns property on the moon, mars, and six of Jupiter's moons.



Last edited by Buff at Oct 20 2003, 08:06 PM
FightThePatent
10-20-2003, 09:58 PM
I believe patent #69 predates your patents, thus invalidating you.

sorry.


Fight the Porn Patent!

:biglaugh:
Buff
10-20-2003, 09:59 PM
Originally posted by FightThePatent@Oct 20 2003, 08:06 PM
I believe patent #69 predates your patents, thus invalidating you.

sorry.


Fight the Porn Patent!

:biglaugh:
I'll have my lawyers investigate your claim. In the meantime, your use of the number 69 is included under one of my heretofor mentioned patents. Pay up.
FightThePatent
10-20-2003, 10:09 PM
Originally posted by Buff@Oct 20 2003, 06:07 PM
[QUOTE=FightThePatent,Oct 20 2003, 08:06 PM]In the meantime, your use of the number 69 is included under one of my heretofor mentioned patents. Pay up.
You didn't read the patent... it's patent number is 69, but the patent describes the reverse couple position for mutual gratification to be Position #70. It's one level better than 69.

The patent also reads that Barry White must be playing with the volume setting at 11 to properly experience 70.


Fight the Porn Patent!
Vick
10-20-2003, 10:10 PM
Pssssss..... I have the patent on masturbation so

Buff you owe me more than I owe you B)
FightThePatent
10-20-2003, 10:23 PM
Originally posted by Vick@Oct 20 2003, 06:18 PM
Pssssss..... I have the patent on masturbation
Since masturbation is a single-person activity, it stands free and clear of patent #69.



Fight the Porn Patent!
*KK*
10-20-2003, 10:53 PM
Um, wow, I never knew Buff would go to such lengths to try and get people to have sex with him ;)
Mike AI
10-20-2003, 10:59 PM
Originally posted by *KK*@Oct 20 2003, 10:01 PM
Um, wow, I never knew Buff would go to such lengths to try and get people to have sex with him ;)


Yeah I hear he is giving special sweet heart deals for hot chicks!!

:zoinks:
FightThePatent
10-20-2003, 11:20 PM
Originally posted by Mike AI@Oct 20 2003, 07:07 PM
Yeah I hear he is giving special sweet heart deals for hot chicks!!



Sweetheart deals go to big players.

:wnw:


Fight the Patent!
Buff
10-20-2003, 11:25 PM
Originally posted by *KK*@Oct 20 2003, 09:01 PM
Um, wow, I never knew Buff would go to such lengths to try and get people to have sex with him ;)
I'm a guy. I'd go to any length short of a threat ;)
PornoDoggy
10-20-2003, 11:26 PM
When the revolution comes all your patents will belong to the people.




















Well, okay, they'll technically belong to me, but I am, of course, very benevolent
Buff
10-20-2003, 11:35 PM
Originally posted by PornoDoggy@Oct 20 2003, 09:34 PM
When the revolution comes all your patents will belong to the people.




















Well, okay, they'll technically belong to me, but I am, of course, very benevolent
hahaha -- well first, they'll belong to the state. Then later they'll belong to the people :P
Billy
10-20-2003, 11:36 PM
Originally posted by Vick@Oct 20 2003, 09:18 PM
Pssssss..... I have the patent on masturbation so

Buff you owe me more than I owe you B)
Vick.. you are right, Buff will be working off this debt for a LONG time !
Mike AI
10-20-2003, 11:42 PM
Originally posted by FightThePatent+Oct 20 2003, 10:28 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (FightThePatent @ Oct 20 2003, 10:28 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteBegin--Mike AI@Oct 20 2003, 07:07 PM
Yeah I hear he is giving special sweet heart deals for hot chicks!!



Sweetheart deals go to big players.

:wnw:


Fight the Patent![/b][/quote]


Yeah I hear that R-n Levi made the best deal with Buff on his patents.
FightThePatent
10-20-2003, 11:43 PM
All your porn are belong to us



Fight the Porn Patent!
Vick
10-20-2003, 11:47 PM
Originally posted by Billy+Oct 20 2003, 10:44 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Billy @ Oct 20 2003, 10:44 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteBegin--Vick@Oct 20 2003, 09:18 PM
Pssssss..... I have the patent on masturbation so

Buff you owe me more than I owe you B)
Vick.. you are right, Buff will be working off this debt for a LONG time ![/b][/quote]
Heard a rumor that Buff will be trying to work the debt off by selling to the sperm bank :rolleyes:
Billy
10-21-2003, 12:03 AM
well Vick if he does that you might have your money sooner then I thought, if he goes 3 times a day for a few weeks : )